Our Home Study finally got approved by Adoption Services!! So Friday I went and picked it up and arranged to go to our lawyers office to get it notarized. I sat in the lawyers office for three hours while they made seven copies of several documents and then signed and put their seal on every single page (the assistant said it was almost 500 pages of signing and sealing). I'm sure they love me there. Now some might be thinking "three hours at the lawyers office? Why didn't you leave and come back Monday morning to pick it up?", but all the adoptive moms out there are thinking "I totally get that!". See, as adoptive moms our paperwork represents our children, and we don't just want to leave it with anyone! I've actually laid awake at night thinking "I should go get our adoption file and keep it by the bed just in case there's a house fire in the middle of the night". Sounds crazy, right? It's no more crazy than after we had our first newborn. The first few nights after we put him in his crib in his own room I actually slept with the baby monitor on my my pillow until Kevin convinced me that no matter how close I had it to my ear I would never hear him STOP breathing. So this mothering journey, whether with my biological kids, foster babes, or adopted children is just one big long lesson in letting go of control and releasing it to my very capable Heavenly Father - at least for this mom it is.
So the next step for us now is to get the remainder of our paperwork copied 7 times, putting the whole thing together, with the French translations attached, and sending it to Ottawa for Authentication. Some friends of ours just finished this step and said their stuff was in Ottawa for about 7 weeks. So hopefully, if I can get this stuff out of here by the beginning of December, we should get it back and sent to Haiti by the end of January?? Here's hoping!
Some other exciting news is that God's Littlest Angels (our orphanage), posted on their blog that they just completed their first post-earthquake adoption (keep in mind there were no adoptions happening for several months after the earthquake). Typically in Haiti, after you get your proposal (aka. referral, match), it takes 9-12 months before you can travel to pick them up. However this adoption only took 8 months between proposal and travel! We have heard that the adoption process in Haiti has sped up some in the last few months, but this confirms it! When you are waiting for your little ones to come home every month, week and day counts! We are so thankful for this news.
Some have been asking about our domestic adoption (adopting our foster daughter). I haven't posted anything about that because nothing has really happened yet and we are just waiting for the adoption worker to contact us to begin the process. But the other reason is, with fostering there are a lot of confidentiality issues and I'm not sure yet what I can and cannot post, so I'm playing it safe and not posting anything, as of yet. Thanks for asking, though. In the meantime we are just enjoying having her in our family and watching her grow and develop beautifully!
Sunday, 20 November 2011
Monday, 14 November 2011
Anniversaries, Rats and Home Studies
So my husband and I went to the mountains this weekend to celebrate our 18th anniversary! Some people at this stage in their marriage might renew their wedding vows, but for Kevin and I it goes more like “don’t you leave me with all these kids, or I’ll hunt you down!”. It’s not quite as sentimental as a vow renewal, but it’s very meaningful to us.
On our way to the mountains we discussed how, with the prospect of having six kids in our future, this would probably be one of the last times we can get away just the two of us. We also talked about how we will probably never fly ANYWHERE when we have to buy eight plane tickets. We also thought that we’ll probably never get invited to peoples houses…ever again. Then to spiral our conversation further downward I told Kevin how I was reading the blog from the orphanage we are adopting from (God’s Littlest Angels), and how they had a list of tradespeople they would love to come for a visit. On that list, one of the trades they are seeking is “rat exterminator”!! I wish I was joking, but I’m serious! Because we will be be staying at the orphanage both times we travel there, one of my first thoughts was “when we meet our little ones for the first time won’t they think it’s a little weird that I’m riding on Kevin’s shoulders?” The other thought I had is “HOW IN THE WORLD AM I GOING TO FALL ASLEEP THERE?!!” I think Kevin’s going to have to club me over the head, or buy me a full suit of armor…I’m only semi-kidding.
These are the fears we are working through. These are the things our brains chew on when we lay in bed at night. But then, morning dawns and we open our Bibles and read things like “I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you” (John 14:18) and we are reminded that the heart of God is passionate about rescuing orphans and that when we join him in this work we are being the very hands and feet of Jesus. Jesus touched lepers, you know. Jesus travelled to the slums and ate dinner with prostitutes and outcasts, you know. Jesus suffered and laid down his very life. Hmmm. I guess I can sleep with rats (I can’t actually believe I just said that).
My spiritual side is constantly battling with my flesh. Why do I think I deserve comfort so much when most of the world lives in such discomfort? Why do I like it so much when it is the exact opposite of what Christ has called me to? Pretty heavy stuff.
On a lighter note…I phoned Adoption Services today to find out what is taking our Home Study approval so long (what was supposed to take 4-6 weeks has taken 8). I mean really, our home study shouldn’t take this long to approve – it’s probably one of the most boring home studies they’ve ever read. In fact, I cannot believe that our social worker could come up with 20+ pages of information on us – she’s good. Anyways, as it turns out, Adoption Services was waiting for some minor changes that needed to be made that our agency thought they already sent. So now they sent them. It will be ready by Wednesday. Sometimes it just pays to make a phone call : )
Tuesday, 8 November 2011
The Journey Begins...
Well, it all began after our third child was born and Kevin and I declared "it is finished"! We were done. No more kids for us! There's a saying that goes "if you want to hear God laugh, tell him your plans". A few years later and a whole journey of working through my fears, we became a foster family. We were feeling pretty stretched and challenged with fostering babies, but God started calling us to international adoption. My standard response when I feel God leading me into foreign territory is to offer him my list of inadequacies. But God's loving reply to me was that he wasn't looking for a super-mom who had mastered all the Fruits of the Spirt (thank goodness). He was just looking for someone with a willing heart.
Over the next few weeks it seemed that everywhere I went I was running into adoptive families and stories about orphans. An African children's choir came to our church during this time. Although I had seen them a few times before and it had always moved me, this time their stories were breaking my heart and I couldn't stop my tears. God was undeniably opening my heart to the plight of the orphan. There was just one problem. While I had told Kevin what God was doing in my heart, he wasn't jumping on the bandwagon with me. Hmmm. What to do? Well, just like you need two parents to have biological kids, you need two parents to adopt kids (it's a little different, but you know what I mean). So I did what every spiritually mature woman does when she's perplexed...I phoned my sister! Tammy, who was busy working on her fourth international adoption reminded me that Kevin and I needed to be in agreement and that I couldn't manipulate or force him (rats!). So I began to pray earnestly that if this really was what God wanted for us that He would be the one to speak to Kevin's heart.
That very weekend we were at a Steven Curtis Chapman concert, and right in the middle of it there was a huge presentation on adoption! During the music video where they showed beautiful faces of orphans around the world I glanced over at my strong husband and saw him wiping tears off his cheeks. Isn't God amazing?!
So now what? Well, we felt the Lord calling us to adopt from Haiti and we both felt that we should get a sibling group - yes TWO! And at the same time it was looking like we were going to be able to adopt our foster daughter! I know you're adding it up right now. I'll save you the math - it's six. SIX children! That number terrified us, but the thought that there were two special little people waiting for us in Haiti that God had hand-picked to be a part of our family absolutely thrilled us. And my sister and brother-in-law assured us that, while we are living in the middle of our affluent Canadian lifestyle, adding two children to our family seems ridiculous, but when we are in Haiti, and we see the poverty and the multitude of orphans we will be thinking "Two! All we can take are two?!" I know they're right and I also know from being a foster mommy that God gives us the strength to do the things he has called us to do.
So where are we at in our journey today? Criminal checks done, medicals done, psychological assessment done (yes, we passed), reference letters done, employment letters done, letter from bank done, home study written, etc. etc. and everything translated into french. We are just waiting to get our home study back from Children's services as well as our Approval Letter. Then it's just Notarization, sending 7 copies of everything to Ottawa for Authentication, then it's off to Haiti! Because my sister's last three adoptions have been from China, I am used to how they do it where you wait and wait, get your referral (match), and then travel fairly quickly afterwards. However, with Haiti you get your referral fairly quickly (especially if you are taking a boy or a sibling group), and then you wait about 9-12 months before you travel to bring them home.
So that's our past, present and future in a nutshell. I'll try my best to be diligent on posting any updates, and hey, if I can figure out how, I may even post some photos!
I'll close today's post with a great verse from Psalm 68 that has spoken to me many times through our journey of fostering, domestic adoption and international adoption.
"His name is the Lord. A father to the fatherless...God places the lonely in families."
Over the next few weeks it seemed that everywhere I went I was running into adoptive families and stories about orphans. An African children's choir came to our church during this time. Although I had seen them a few times before and it had always moved me, this time their stories were breaking my heart and I couldn't stop my tears. God was undeniably opening my heart to the plight of the orphan. There was just one problem. While I had told Kevin what God was doing in my heart, he wasn't jumping on the bandwagon with me. Hmmm. What to do? Well, just like you need two parents to have biological kids, you need two parents to adopt kids (it's a little different, but you know what I mean). So I did what every spiritually mature woman does when she's perplexed...I phoned my sister! Tammy, who was busy working on her fourth international adoption reminded me that Kevin and I needed to be in agreement and that I couldn't manipulate or force him (rats!). So I began to pray earnestly that if this really was what God wanted for us that He would be the one to speak to Kevin's heart.
That very weekend we were at a Steven Curtis Chapman concert, and right in the middle of it there was a huge presentation on adoption! During the music video where they showed beautiful faces of orphans around the world I glanced over at my strong husband and saw him wiping tears off his cheeks. Isn't God amazing?!
So now what? Well, we felt the Lord calling us to adopt from Haiti and we both felt that we should get a sibling group - yes TWO! And at the same time it was looking like we were going to be able to adopt our foster daughter! I know you're adding it up right now. I'll save you the math - it's six. SIX children! That number terrified us, but the thought that there were two special little people waiting for us in Haiti that God had hand-picked to be a part of our family absolutely thrilled us. And my sister and brother-in-law assured us that, while we are living in the middle of our affluent Canadian lifestyle, adding two children to our family seems ridiculous, but when we are in Haiti, and we see the poverty and the multitude of orphans we will be thinking "Two! All we can take are two?!" I know they're right and I also know from being a foster mommy that God gives us the strength to do the things he has called us to do.
So where are we at in our journey today? Criminal checks done, medicals done, psychological assessment done (yes, we passed), reference letters done, employment letters done, letter from bank done, home study written, etc. etc. and everything translated into french. We are just waiting to get our home study back from Children's services as well as our Approval Letter. Then it's just Notarization, sending 7 copies of everything to Ottawa for Authentication, then it's off to Haiti! Because my sister's last three adoptions have been from China, I am used to how they do it where you wait and wait, get your referral (match), and then travel fairly quickly afterwards. However, with Haiti you get your referral fairly quickly (especially if you are taking a boy or a sibling group), and then you wait about 9-12 months before you travel to bring them home.
So that's our past, present and future in a nutshell. I'll try my best to be diligent on posting any updates, and hey, if I can figure out how, I may even post some photos!
I'll close today's post with a great verse from Psalm 68 that has spoken to me many times through our journey of fostering, domestic adoption and international adoption.
"His name is the Lord. A father to the fatherless...God places the lonely in families."
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